Chapter 4

Raegan had recovered. When she emerged, she was not as arrogant as before. She appeared so frail that she seemed like she could be swept away by a breeze.

Whenever she saw me, she would avoid me.

This only made Alex more sympathetic towards her, and he spent more time visiting her place.

That sparked a trend in the whole palace, where everyone began dieting and walking as if a gentle breeze could sway them.

They were in a bid to catch Alex's eye.

I found it utterly disdainful.

Was it really worth it for a man?

On this point, the Empress, Valerie Nash, and I shared the same view. We often sat together, sipping tea and admiring the snow.

We had known each other for many years and had never competed. When no one was around, I was as close to her as her sister.

Her eyes always seemed blank, and she would often mutter to herself, "Alin passed away in such fine weather. He died in my arms and failed to survive the winter."

I nodded. "He was such a good boy."

He was Valerie's son, Alex's eldest. He was so bright.

At three, he had started to learn, and his performance was great. He loved clinging to me, following me around, and calling me.

He was truly an adorable boy.

Had he lived, he would have been Alex's legitimate eldest son. Now he should have been eight and would have been the Crown Prince.

I felt sympathy for Valerie and for myself.

We were in a similar situation.

She had a son and then lost him, while I had never had one before.

A cold wind blew, and she began to cough. She had just recovered from a serious illness and should have been resting. But she insisted on dragging me out to enjoy the snow.

I suspected she might not survive much longer.

I asked her, "Has Alex gone to see you?"

She shook her head. "There's no need. Ever since Alin died, any affection between us has ended."

I had always known her to be gentle and kind, but I never realized she had that side.

She had a deep-seated resentment towards Alex, who was so heartless.

And I was the same.

Valerie tried to advise me again. "Lillian, you still have a long life ahead. If you lower your head just a little, your life won't be so hard."

But I didn't have much more time.

Soon, I would join my father and my brother.

Since Alex forced me to have a tea, which caused me to never get pregnant, executed my maids, and killed my family, I was destined never to bow to him.

5

Before I was ten years old, my father guarded the frontier.

I was born on the grasslands, wild and untamed.

When we returned to the capital city, I remained unruly and beat up every young noble around.

Only Alex wasn't afraid of me. He even praised me for being beautiful.

I laughed so hard I nearly doubled over. I asked him to marry me.

He agreed.

From then on, I spent every day with him.

My father disapproved of my marriage to Alex, as he thought that Alex was just a prince who was not favored by his father and that he wasn't worthy of me.

But I liked Alex, so I snuck out to see him.

When I finally saw Alex, I threw myself into his arms and exclaimed, "I missed you."

Alex effortlessly picked me up and said with a smile, "Lillian, wait for me a little longer. Once I become the crown prince, I'll marry you."

I pouted. I didn't care about the title of crown prince. As long as I could get married to him, it was good enough.

So I ignored my father's disapproval and the judgmental stares of others and made it known that I would definitely marry Alex.

His mother was once the emperor's favored concubine. But she was framed and sent to a secluded place used for disgraced women. She could have regained the emperor's favor by lowering her head. But she was too proud to do so.

She chose to hang herself with a white silk ribbon in the secluded place.

It left Alex alone at a young age. He had suffered a lot.

Thus, he hated those who were stubbornly defiant like his mother, and I was precisely that.

Alex grew up in the secluded place where her mother had died and suffered greatly. He swore to climb to the highest position.

The emperor noticed his progress and remembered his mother. Finally, he became the crown prince.

Moreover, my father held military power. If I married him, no one else could be the crown prince.

After much effort, Alex became the crown prince and fulfilled his promise to marry me.

However, I found I was not the only woman Alex would marry. The Grand Tutor's daughter, Valerie, became Alex's wife, while I was merely a secondary consort.

To secure his position, Alex had to marry Valerie.

When I found out the truth, I was so angry that I refused to meet him for days.

To appease me, Alex climbed over the wall into my house, only to be chased through by a large dog. He eventually appeared before me in a messy state.

He tightly held a peach blossom branch, which he had picked from the outskirts.

He told me that he only loved me and that marrying Valerie was a necessity.

I believed his words.

At that moment, I should have realized that while he loved me, he loved his throne even more.