Chapter 3

A few days later, Nicole' s mentor, Dr. Alistair Finch, passed away. The funeral was scheduled for the weekend, the same weekend I was supposed to be sending out our wedding invitations.

"You have to come, Ethan," Nicole said, her voice strained. She hadn't mentioned the surrogacy again, and we were circling each other in a cold, silent truce. "It would be disrespectful if you didn't."

I didn't want to go. I didn't want to be part of her world anymore. But a small, stupid part of me still felt a sense of duty. I had known Dr. Finch. He had been kind to me, in his own distant way.

So I went.

The funeral home was in a remote suburb, an hour's drive from the city. The air was thick with the scent of lilies and grief. Ryan was there, of course, clinging to Nicole's arm like a drowning man. He was putting on a masterclass performance, his face a mask of tragic sorrow, his eyes constantly seeking out Nicole's for reassurance. He completely ignored my presence, as if I were a piece of furniture.

Nicole played her part, too, stroking his back, murmuring comforting words, her entire focus on him. I stood alone, an outsider at my own fiancée's side.

Dr. Finch's wife, a frail woman named Eleanor, pulled me aside at one point.

"Ethan," she said, her eyes red-rimmed but clear. "I need to apologize for Nicole."

I was taken aback. "What for?"

"She loved Alistair, but... she gets lost in her sense of duty. She told me once, a long time ago, that she loved you more than she thought she was capable of loving anyone. I think it scared her." She patted my hand. "Don't give up on her."

Her words were meant to be kind, but they just felt like another twist of the knife. It was all so pathetic. A love that was too scary to act on? A duty that always came before me? I felt a wave of pity for this woman, and for myself.

As the service ended, a storm broke. Rain hammered against the roof, and the sky turned a bruised purple. People rushed to their cars.

"I need to take Ryan home," Nicole announced, not looking at me. "He's in no state to be alone."

"What about me?" I asked, gesturing to the downpour outside. "We came in one car, Nicole."

"Can't you get an Uber?" she said, already guiding a sobbing Ryan towards the exit. "He needs me right now, Ethan."

And just like that, she was gone. She closed the door, leaving me stranded in a funeral home in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of a thunderstorm. I watched her car pull away, the red tail lights disappearing into the sheeting rain.

I didn't call an Uber. I started walking. The rain soaked through my suit in seconds, cold and unforgiving. By the time I finally found a train station an hour later, I was shivering uncontrollably, a fever already starting to burn behind my eyes.