Chapter 7 Between fear and longing

Chapter 7: Between Fear and Longing

Ava sat cross-legged on her bed, eyes skimming over the open novel in her lap. But the words blurred together unread. Every few minutes, her mind betrayed her, wandering back to him. She could still feel the ghost of his presence from earlier, the faint scent of his cologne tangling in the hallway, twisting something deep inside her.

She exhaled loudly, snapped the book shut, and slung it aside as she leaned back against the pillows to debate how much longer she could keep up the illusion this was something she could overlook.

A light knock snapped her out of her reverie. Her heart jumped, then ran. She straightened further, her throat clearing. "Come in."

Ethan opened the door, looking effortlessly handsome as he did, leaning against the doorframe in that infuriatingly nonchalant way he had. "Got a minute?"

Ava nodded, forcing a casual smile off her lips. "What's up?"

He stepped inside. His gaze swept her room, and he said, "Just needed some advice," though his tone made it seem like an excuse. Ava's skin prickled as he neared her, settling on the edge of her bed, almost too close to touch knees.

"What kind of advice?" she managed, keeping her voice steady.

Oh, you know, just... things." He shrugged, looking down, then glanced up at her-a glint of mischief dancing in his eyes that skittered her pulse. "Sometimes I feel like I don't know what I'm doing here."

The words came out light, but something a little deeper loosed within her. Ava swallowed as her throat went dry. "I... I think you're doing just fine," she replied-the words softer than she had meant.

Neither spoke, electricity hanging in the air between them. His eyes held hers, and she felt herself drown in their gaze, the room around them fading until there was only him. It would be so easy to reach out, to close the space between them...

She turned away quickly, the heat rising to her cheeks. Ethan's hand was so near hers, almost touching. She was acutely aware of that little space in between, as though it was even taunting her to reach across and break it.

"Hey," he said softly-the tone growing to a whisper. She looked up, meeting his gaze. He appeared to hesitate, searching her face. "You okay?

The concern in his eyes was her undoing. She opened her mouth to speak, words refusing to come. She was torn between fear of what crossing this line could mean and undeniable longing tugging her toward him.

"I'm fine," she said finally, though her voice barely rose above a whisper. Pulling her hand from his, she rose to her feet, putting space between them. "I just... need some air."

Ethan's eyes flashed with something unreadable, but he nodded, easing back onto her bed, watching her retreat with an intensity that made her heart ache.

The doorknob turned under her hand, and she pressed one hand against her chest, where the unyielding pulse pounded against her rib cage. She didn't know how much longer she could keep fighting this-this feeling that terrified and thrilled her in equal measure.