Chapter 4 The weight of desire

~Haisley~

I sat on my bed, knees clutched to my chest, my breath is hallow and slow, the eerie silence is deafening as the wall were holding thier breath. I hated how Hazel always had a way of intimating me. How she would always stare at me as if she could tell what was going on in my mind.

The moonlight pierce inside my room, spilling on the floor, the gentle cool breeze fanned my skin.

The room felt too still, too quiet, almost as if the shadows themselves were watching me. The soft rustle of the wind outside was the only sound that dared to break the oppressive silence, but even that seemed to be holding its breath. I didn't know how long I had been sitting here, curled into myself like I was trying to dissappear. Time had stopped the moment Hazel and I shared eye contact. The way her eyes locked onto mine, cutting through my defenses legs they didn't even exist, left me paralyzed. The was a weight to her gaze that I couldn't escape.

It felt as though she could read every single thought I had, as if my secret were no longer mine. And I hated it.

I had wanted to scream at her, tell her to stop looking at me like that. But the words wouldn't come, they never did. They lodged in my throat like stones, heavy and immovable. I was terrified-terrified of her, terrified of how she could slice through my walls with nothing more than a glance.

Why did she have to be so... so Hazel?

She knew how to manipulate everything in her favor. She had that power, that subtlety. Knew how to make people small without even trying. And yet, somehow, despite how much I loathed the way she made me feel, there was something else in her that I couldn't ignore.

The soft breeze stirred the curtains, and I could almost imagine her standing there, behind me, her presence filling the room. My mind wandered. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to push that thought away. But it lingered like smoke.

I sprawled on the mattress letting nature take over as my eyelids slowly pull me into darkness - where I would be safe for a while.

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It was the next morning, and my stomach is tight with knots, I nervously pick up my pencil placing the wood into my back carefully. With some encouraging words I walk out of to the dining table- All three of them, clearly having a great time without me, Hazel shows her flawless smile that seemed to melt my parent's heart.

"I will be waiting outside, Hazel," I say faintly, I didn't have the appetite for food, she gives a sharp nod waving her hand, dismissive lyrics, like she was already anticipating my retreat.

"I'll be right out," she said lightly, her voice as smooth as silk. "I'm just finishing up. You don't mind waiting, do you?"

I nodded sharply, my throat tight. "No, I'm fine," I managed to say, though I was anything but. I turned quickly, my feet moving faster than my mind could keep up with, and I made my way to the door.

I finally breathe out, without even realizing that I was holding it in,the opening sound of the door echoed and I turned to face her, my heart racing. She was standing a few feet away, hands tucked into the pockets of her jacket, her posture as effortlessly perfect as ever. Her blonde hair framed her face, and her lips curled into that smile again-sweet, innocent, and yet so unbearably loaded.

"Let's get going," she says cooling walking past me, leaving a wave of perfume as she walked.The smell of it-sweet and floral-clung to my clothes as I followed her to the car, sliding into the driver's seat.

I sat rigid in the passenger's seat, fingers white around the strap of my bag. I would rather take the bus- anything but this slient ride with Hazel who had not even acknowledged my presence. I stared out the window, watching the world blur past us, my thoughts too loud in my head.

When we arrived, Hazel slipped out first, phone in her hand, a cold mask if indifference in her face, she didn't even wait for me, didn't even glance. I slipped out behind her, careful not to attract attention.

I had only taken a few steps, when the air changed.

Two figures.

Moved through the crowd with ease- such precision. Every step was poised, controlled, like they had a rhythm that no one else could follow.

Xavier.

I recognized him immediately, Even from this distance, I could see it. He walked like he owned the air around him, like he owned time itself, the space between seconds. The world seemed to bend around him as if it knew it couldn't compete. His shoulders were broad beneath a black sleeveless shirt, tattoos of intricate designs snaking down his arms. The inked seemed to pulse with life, like it was as much as a part of him as his skin. He didn't walk; he commanded the ground beneath him to bend to his will.

As he passes, his eyes flicked over to me, and for a split second, our gazes met.

I froze.

My heart raced, a staccato beat that echoed in my chest. I wasn't sure why

He smiled and whispered something to the other one,-who I assumed to be his companion-looked over at me, eyes narrowing in amusement, before they both broke into a laugh. I felt my stomach twist, confused, unsure of what was happening.

Why were they looking at me like that?

I turned away, my cheeks burning, not sure if I was imagining things or if there was some deeper meaning behind their actions. But the feeling of their eyes on me, the weight of their laughter, clung to me like a shadow

Suddenly the bell jolted me to reality, reminding me of the days work. I held my bag tight. No time to think about boys, I needed to get to class

Invisible, unnoticed - I reminded myself