Chapter 5 Love Over Fate

Rayne

Reed's room was dark, lit only by the faint glow of his bedside lamp. The bed smelled like him-warm, familiar, safe. His head rested on my chest, his long, luscious hair spilling over my bare skin like silk. One of his arms was draped over me, holding me close as if I might disappear if he let go.

"You know, Amber's been acting so weird lately," Reed murmured suddenly, his voice cutting through the silence.

I hummed absently, running my fingers through his hair. The motion was automatic, something I'd done a hundred times, but my mind was far away.

"She didn't even wait for me after school today," he continued, his tone laced with curiosity. "She's been distant, like she's trying to avoid me or something. Don't you think that's strange?"

Another hum. My hand moved through his hair again, but I wasn't really listening. My thoughts were consumed by something else-someone else.

Amber.

It had been two weeks since that night. Two weeks since I'd marked her. Since I'd lost control and ruined everything. For two weeks, I'd been trying to forget. Trying and failing.

I'd blocked the bond on my end the morning after it happened, slamming the tether shut so hard it was like I was trying to sever it completely. I didn't want to feel her. I didn't want to hear her voice in my head or sense her emotions leaking through. I thought that if I closed her out, I could move on.

But the bond didn't work that way. Even with it blocked, I still felt her. A faint hum in the back of my mind, a constant reminder that she existed, that she was there, tethered to me in a way I couldn't escape.

No amount of mental walls could erase the reality of it-I had marked her. We were bonded now, and nothing could undo that. No pretending could change the fact that my body craved her, no matter how much I hated it.

I wanted to hate her. Hell, I needed to hate her.

I wanted to hate her fiery red hair, the way it made her stand out like a flame in the dark. I wanted to despise her freckles, scattered across her pale skin like stars. I wanted to hate those cerulean eyes that always looked too damn vulnerable, too damn innocent.

And that scent-honeysuckle. Sweet, overpowering, intoxicating. It clung to my skin, my clothes, my memory, no matter how hard I scrubbed.

But the worst part was the sound of her moans.

Dear goddess...

I shifted on the bed as the memory of that night clawed its way to the surface again, uninvited. Amber's moans were the first thing I always remembered-soft, desperate, utterly intoxicating. I could see her lips parted and trembling, the way they'd looked when she was lost beneath me. Her body writhing, her skin flushed, her back arching as she gasped and clung to me like I was the only thing keeping her grounded. Her arms had wrapped around me so tightly, as if I were her salvation.

And then the way she whimpered when I knotted her and sunk my fangs into her mating gland. Goddess, that sound.

I could still feel it-the way she clenched around me, her body greedy and desperate, taking in every drop of my seed like it was what she'd been made for. Like her whole existence was to submit to me and carry my pups.

"Fucking gods," I muttered under my breath, dragging a hand over my face.

The image was so vivid my body always responded immediately. Heat would coil low in my stomach, spreading through me like fire, and no matter how hard I tried to will it away, my traitorous cock would harden in my pants, straining painfully against the fabric.

Like right now. I'd lost count how many times I'd gotten hard to the mere thought of her this past week. My pants were uncomfortably tight.

'Pathetic,' Eden, my wolf, sneered. 'Look at you. You can't even sit here without thinking about her. She's ours, Rayne. Stop trying to deny it.'

The words hit harder than I wanted to admit. I hated him for saying it, hated the bond for making it true.

"Fuck," I whispered.

Reed stirred against me, his head lifting from my chest. "Rayne? What's wrong?" He asked softly, his voice laced with concern.

I froze, but his gaze drifted lower, and the second his eyes landed on the tent in my pants, his expression shifted. A grin spread across his face, wide and teasing, and he tilted his head. "Well, well," he said, amusement dripping from his tone. "I was starting to think you didn't find me attractive anymore."

"Reed, don't-"

"For the past two weeks, you've been distant," he continued, cutting me off with a laugh. "You haven't been in the mood, but now..." He gestured toward the unmistakable bulge in my pants, his grin widening. "Looks like you're finally back to normal, babe."

I shifted under his gaze, trying to will the heat to fade. But my wolf growled low in my mind, a warning.

'This isn't right,' Eden snarled. 'She's our mate, not him. Stop this. Now.'

Reed moved quickly, shifting to straddle my lap, his hands already reaching for my belt. "I've missed this," he murmured, his voice soft and sultry. "Can't wait for you to pound me into the bed."

Eden's growl turned into a roar, his voice thundering in my mind. 'Stop him, Rayne. You know what will happen if you go through with this. She'll feel it. She'll suffer because of you.'

I didn't need him to remind me. I already knew. Amber would be the one to pay the price.

"She's our mate," Eden growled. "And you've shut her out for two weeks. You haven't spoken to her, haven't checked on her. She's hurting because of you, and this is how you repay her?"

Guilt twisted in my chest, sharp and suffocating. Amber hadn't asked for this bond. She hadn't asked to be marked. I had done that to her.

Reed undid my belt, his fingers moving to unzip my pants. I grabbed his wrists, stopping him.

"Reed, wait," I said, my voice strained.

He blinked at me, confusion flickering in his brown eyes. "What's wrong?"

Eden's voice was harsh, relentless, filled with disgust. 'You're bonded, Rayne. Amber is our mate. How can you let someone else touch you? You should be ashamed.'

"I..." I swallowed hard, my grip tightening slightly on Reed's wrists. My wolf's words struck again, the guilt twisting in my chest like a knife.

"I... I can't," I muttered, loosening my grip but keeping his hands away.

"Rayne?" Reed's voice was softer now, laced with concern. "Are you okay?"

I opened my eyes, meeting his gaze. "I just... I can't," I said finally, pulling his hands away from me.

Reed frowned, his expression falling. "Why not? You're hard," he said, his tone almost accusing. "You obviously want this."

"It's not that," I returned quickly. "I'm just... tired."

He looked at me for a long moment, as if trying to gauge whether or not I was telling the truth. "Tired?" he repeated, disappointment creeping in.

"I'm sorry," I murmured, avoiding his gaze.

Reed sighed, leaning back slightly. The disappointment in his eyes was almost unbearable. "Fine," he said softly, though his tone was reluctant. "But if you really don't want us to fuck..." He glanced down, a sly smile tugging at his lips. "Then at least let me suck you off. I can't leave you with that massive boner."

I didn't stop him when he slid down, fingers curling under the waistband of my pants, pulling them and my boxers down. The air hit me, cool against heated skin. My cock sprang free, hard and angry. Reed's eyes darkened, lips parting slightly.

He wrapped a warm hand around me, stroking once, twice. I hissed through my teeth. His mouth replaced his hand, enveloping me in heat, tongue swirling around the head before sliding down the shaft, slow and deliberate.

I gripped the sheets, knuckles white, eyes closing as the warmth of his mouth surrounded me.

This was Reed. My Reed. The person I loved most in the world.

I should have been content. But my mind wouldn't stop spinning. The bond hummed faintly, a cruel reminder that Amber still existed, still lingered in the corner of my mind like a shadow I couldn't escape.

I bit down hard on the inside of my cheek, trying not to groan Amber's name as Reed took me deeper. His throat worked around me, swallowing, his hand moving at the base in slow, firm strokes.

I loved Reed. I loved him.

Didn't I?

Amber's moans echoed in my head, unbidden. Her scent wrapped around my memory, sweet and suffocating. I clenched my jaw, hating myself as heat coiled tighter in my gut. Reed's mouth was on me, but in my mind it was her.

I gripped his hair, my hips jerking once as he took me all the way down, nose pressing to my base. My breath caught.

"Fuck," I whispered. I didn't know if it was to him or her.

Reed hummed around me, the vibration making my vision blur. His throat flexed, swallowing me again and again, and my body tightened. I tried to think of anything else-the lamp, the ceiling, the cold air-but Amber's name sat on my tongue, burning.

I hated myself for it. I hated her for it.

"I love you," I heard myself say, but even to my own ears it sounded like a plea.

Reed didn't stop. His hand stroked as his mouth worked, wet and messy now, drool sliding down my length. He moaned softly around me like he liked the taste.

My hips rolled despite myself, chasing it, heat climbing until it was unbearable.

Amber.

The bond thrummed once, faint but sharp, as if she'd felt it.

I bit my lip hard enough to taste blood, choking on her name as I spilled into Reed's mouth. He swallowed around me, taking it, his tongue lapping at the head even as I twitched, overstimulated.

For a moment, everything felt right again.

Then the haze of pleasure faded. The bond hummed faintly, a cruel reminder.

No. I wouldn't let her ruin this.

I'd made my decision. I've loved Reed for so long and my feelings weren't going to change-not now, not ever.

I would find a way to break the mate bond with Amber, no matter what it took. Even if it left her ruined for the rest of her life.